Chess past

I been kinda emotional lately.

Mike and I were taking the chinatown bus back from Philly where we had spent the night visiting Quentin, Mickey Walker and the Heasley family... Mike handed me my ticket as we were boarding the bus but once in my seat I couldn't find it anywhere. Coat pockets and pants pockets and wallet checking.Total tears and blaming myself for being retarded. Running out of steam and accusing Mike of making me DROP my ticket when he held onto my backpack straps to prevent me from cutting off some old lady who wanted to board the bus first.

"Well maybe I DROPPED it while i thought someone was trying to STEAL MY BACKPACK!"

"Pfffft. I'll buy you a new ticket."

"No. Forget it."

More tears about how I could be such a petty baby. Who the fuck cares where a $10 bus ticket went?

Today I argued with my mother over the space and ingredient requirements of a soup recipe till i had a tantrum, announced that I didn't even CARE because I HATE cooking in this house and didn't want to eat anything ANYWAY, pounded like 5 diet pills in front of her and stormed off to cry in my room.

I am totally ready to move to Canada and raise kids, right?!? Which one of us will draw with crayons all over the wall? Who will pound their fists into the mattress and wish daddy was here? Who will look back on a life of failed psychopharmacology? Who will fake their own death repeatedly for humourous effect?

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July 18 - 16 July 2007
Weekly recap. - 28 May 2007
That's Immaterial! - 25 May 2007
A Shalom to Arms! - 07 May 2007
YEAH RIGHT - 20 April 2007