Check it out. I want to post some pictures from my pal Zoe's brief but rad visit to my fair city but haven't the time so I'll tell you a funny story about my mom that she will be really upset that I told you okay?


So my mom is going out yesterday at like 6pm. The elevator arrives and she gets on. Already inside is this handyman from our building who we both think is fairly attractive in that eastern european fashion! Anyhoo, she strikes up a little conversation with him about carbon monoxide detector installation- not noticing if anyone else was in the elevator.

He, the handyman, is facing the door, my mother is sorta facing him with her back to the corner. Apparently there was some chinese food deliveryman behind her whom she didn't notice until she, you know, put her hands behind her back to lean on the wall and, you know, totally CRADLED HIS BALLS!!!

She jumped forward and the dude who just got a free dinky massage was equally startled. Then the elevator door opened in the lobby, where I was standing- having just gotten home from work. My mom didn't see me as she rushed right past so i grabbed her arm and said "Have a nice time!"

She called from her cell once I got upstairs and told me the story adding "I couldn't have MORE touched his dick if I was TRYING to touch his dick. And since it was BOTH hands I really cradled it! ..."

But while she may have been mortified I, on the other hand, was hilarified ...and that's why you read my awesome diary that kicks ass everyday for free.

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July 18 - 16 July 2007
Weekly recap. - 28 May 2007
That's Immaterial! - 25 May 2007
A Shalom to Arms! - 07 May 2007
YEAH RIGHT - 20 April 2007