TKO at Tinkle

So the other night I went out to see some comedian dudes with my mom. And I sent her in to get tickets because I was busy smoking. So I'm standing on the street by myself and this girl comes out of this door and is all "Elizabeth. Bayne. Mann!" and I think I just stood there like a retard like I was trying to determine if she was in fact, talking to me, or I had some really weird coincidence on my hands. But she recognized me from my diary. Cool and scary! But thankfully she was not some 40 year old man with a huge "jazz collection" so it's not scary at all.

Anyway, we went in and comic dudes were funny but then I got distracted by some dumb bitch who was talking trash on my mom, and fueled by several gin and tonics, an empty stomach and menstrual force- I found myself consumed by smashing her face. All through the second act I was rehearsing my speech and possible subsequent jaw smash USA. But then she escaped and my mom ended up getting upset at ME for acting "out of control"

Apparently I can't drink without turning into Shannen Doherty.

So we got pizza and went home and I worried about making a bad first impression on my new pal as my mom was quick to point out.

Tonight I am going to hang with pals and try not to rearrange anyone's face. It's a good thing I'm not famous enough to be on E!'s Celebrities Uncensored. Or am I!!?!?!?

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July 18 - 16 July 2007
Weekly recap. - 28 May 2007
That's Immaterial! - 25 May 2007
A Shalom to Arms! - 07 May 2007
YEAH RIGHT - 20 April 2007